Thursday, July 3, 2008

If Wishes Were Horses

"If wishes were horses, beggers would ride." I do not know the origin of that statement. I do know my mother used it on a regular basis. It was a staple in the "verbal arsenal" all good mothers have, and her response to such whinings as "I wish I could stay up later" or "I wish you would just spank me instead of lecturing me."

I have done a great deal of wishing these past two weeks. My bud Kay moved away on June 22. She and her daughter spent their last weekend in town at my house. Kay and Juneau really bonded. I took many mental pictures of the two of them, cuddling on my bed. I wished she could stay, but I knew why she had to leave.

I wish they would outlaw fireworks in my area. Yes I know, bah humbug and what a cranky woman to wish for something like that. The City of Vancouver is not known for many things, but it is IS known for putting on the largest fireworks show west of the Mississppi. You'd think that would be enough. Miss Jessie is terrified of fireworks. She pants, she paces, she trembles, she cries, she runs in circles. There is no comforting her (we have tried medication - it doesn't work) and for a solid week, she lives in this state of anxiety.

11 years ago today my father died of cancer. I wish he had lived to see his grandson growing up. He would have been so proud. I wish he could have met my husband and been able to see what a wonderful man I married. I wish he could have realized that even though I'm not skinny and didn't graduate from college, I am still a person worthy of his love.

I wish I were better at dealing with my pain, and my flashbacks of the accident. I wish I were better at concentrating on asking God for His help and His grace. All the king's doctors and all the king's counselors cannot put Humpty back together again. Only God can.

There you have it - my stable of wishes.


Sandra said...

I wish you peace and comfort, and I send you big hugs :/

mysteryhistorymom said...

My dear friend- I am so sorry that you are having a rough time right now. My girls and I call hard times "bumps in the road". If the road was always smooth then we would never need to lean on the Lord. I try to remind myself of this. I will keep you in my prayers.:-)

I am with you on the fireworks, too. My husband and girls love them, but I am always afraid that someone is going to get hurt.

Take care- Lori

mysteryhistorymom said...

Kim- I know that you are having a tough time right now. You have been on my mind a lot lately.... I wanted to let you know that I am having a giveaway on my blog, though. I would love for you to win! (Jewelry helps me feel a bit better:-) Lori

mysteryhistorymom said...

Kim- I wanted to let you know that I have something for you on my blog! Stop by and see!:-) Lori