Yes, I'm stingy. I see it more and more as the days go by. I am very aware that my resources are limited, and it's important that I not waste them. By resources I mean time, emotions, effort, and vulnerability. I want to share the best of myself with people who truly appreciate me. People who feel I add something of value to their lives.
And....I hate being ignored. I give 110% in my relationships, and don't expect the other person to mirror that, but they should come close the majority of the time. If they are too preoccupied to make me a priority, that's fine. To borrow part of the title of a popular book, maybe they're just not that into me. I'm not going to make a voodoo doll in their likeness and stick pins it. I'll just stop investing my resources in that person. To handle things any differently would require me to be fake, and that is something I cannot and will not do.
I think it's healthy to take a periodic inventory of the relationships in our lives. If you're anything like me, you don't have to make time for this inventory because you have your own built-in warning system. A system that alerts you when things are one-sided. The bottom line is to value yourself, value your emotions, and value your time. It's okay to be stingy. Trust me on this one.
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